Relatively Normal
by A Radical Orange
Summary: A group of hockey players, the best on New England, find their selves trapped in a land full of piece and harmony. Were they came from, they were all relatively normal, each being strange in their own ways. This is shown from the eyes of Michael Grato, the best goalie in the USA, and some one who deals with major anger management problems. What is in store for them?
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first fanfiction. I had this idea for a long time and i wonder if it would be good to write. So, after long contemplation, here it is! MAY have M rated scenarios so don't say i didn't warm ya 'bout "sexual happenings, racial slurs, or other shit" well,** **enjoy!**

Well, shit.

Oh, I'm sorry, i didn't introduce myself. I'm Mike Grato, the best Hockey Goalie in New England and possibly the US of A mo-tha-fuck-ahs! Well, I'm an 18 year old strait from New England itself. I am known as the BEST GOALIE IN NEW ENGLAND, though i say the entire USA. I play for the team of the Knights, the BEST TEAM IN FUCKING NEW ENGLAND! Sorry, when it comes to this subject i gloat. ALOT. Whatever. Well let me get on to the story.

EHEM!

I and my team were at another State Championships. Me, Hunter (Fastest skater in NE), Timmy(best passer in NE), Chucky, who i gotta say can deke about anyone out, Daren, our fat-ass defense who can check anyone, anytime, anyday, and last but not least, Chen, the Asian. You know, Wong Chong? Well, we, as the starting Forwards and Defense of the team, were obviously victorious in our selves. Each of us with scholarships to Colleges we could only imagine as kids. I got one to my dream college, U-MASS. Hunter, too, got one to u-mass. Chuckey to Boston, Timmy to Michigan, and Chen and Daren to Boston University, not with Chuckey. He got Boston State. Well, for most of us, this was the last time we get to play with each other, at least for 4 more years. We thought we would make the best of our time left. Well, fuck that idea...

I thought that we should go explore around in the woods surrounding the hotel. They were dark, eerie woods that we explored only part of last year. We didn't find anything but an old fire pit. I brought a lighter with me for the 'big finale', which was essentially just lighting the pit. We walked the dirt path to where we found it last year. After a while of walking, we made it to the pit. We got some logs, (hey, we aren't weak!) and sat atop them. I lit the fire and we just sat there and talked. We talked of all the years we played together. Stories of past fights and comebacks from near-loss experiences. We all laughed together around this fire. It would become the first, and the last.

After awhile, we decided it was about time to head back. We hurried back to the hotel in which we would say our last goodbyes after tomorrow. As we walked, a strange wing picked up. It was strong, and branches were falling everywhere. Next to us, behind us, and what made me almost shit my pants, one in front of us. We were frozen in fear. Lightning struck right next to us at a tree. The tree toppled over, onto us. We had nothing to do but except defeat.

BOOM!

I awoke to a SHIT feeling in my head. I felt like a Jew the day Hitler asked for a glass of juice. God, did i need an aspirin. I put a hand to my head, only to be responded to a thud on my head with a... HOOF! "HOLY COCK MONKEYS!" I screamed, awaking the four others i hadn't noticed.

"God dammit, what the fuck do you need, i was trying to... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MIKE! HOLY SHIT MAN, YOURE A HOURSE! YOU FUCKING FAGGOT!" Hunter laughed.

"Look at yourself," i replied. He looked at his hoof." Mother of god, what happened!"

"I don't know. All i remember is a tree falling on me."

"As do i," Chen said, trying to stand up but falling down right away.

"Chen, what's that ob your head?"

"I do believe it's a horn, as it seems I'm a mythical creature being known commonly as a unicorn, as is Chuckey. You seem to be a Pegasus as well as Hunter, and Timmy seems normal."

"Dude, talk normal."

"Fine, you miserable Fuck..."

"Why are you so calm? YOURE A FUCKING HOURSE FOR COCKS SAKE."

" Why panic! I just want to blow through this!"

"What if we can't?"

"Meh."

From that point ob, i know we were FUCKED.

**How did you all enjoy this story so far? I'm trying to do good grammar, but typing this on a phone isn't easy. Once i get my laptop, id be updating regularly and often. For now, i will probably do once or twice a week. I'm sorry if you like my story so far. PLEASE R Rs!**

**FIXED!**

**Quote of the day: "Yea, it takes allot of practice and lotion. LOTS of lotion." -Daren to losing team saying we have soft hands.**


	2. Chapter 2

**WHAT UP ANYONE WHO ACTUALLY READS MY STORY! I'm sorry it took awhile, but i got my laptop, and the shit keeping me from writing this chapter is gone and done. well, here is chapter 2! OH! and thanks DarkShroudedSky for your review Yes, i will be updating chapter 1 soon. Also, i ment to put 5 others, not 4. so, there is 6 friends in total.**

Fuckity fuck fuck.

Trapped in a world that has trees that all look the same and it looks like a kids cartoon as talking horses isn't a fun experience. Not to mention we are in the middle of a creepy forest of some sort. From the look of the sun, it looks like it's about mid-day. We all decided it wast time to head out, and maybe find a town to stay at. I, the pure white, orange-haired, blue-eyed Pegasus, lead the way, followed by the green, blue-haired, red-eyed Pegasus Hunter and the yellow, black-haired, brown-eyed unicorn Chen. Following them was the blue, Purple-haired, green-eyed normal horse Chuck, and the Brown, green-haired, brown-eyed unicorn Daren. Timmy, the Purple on purple normal horse stayed back, watching for danger.

We walked for hours. The sun was going down, and all we found was a bush full of berries, which Daren quickly ate. Starving and tired, we started to get desperate. We were running with the last of our energy until we heard a loud scream. It sounded like a kids scream, too. This meant two things. First, there was a house nearby. Second, we need to save some one.

We rushed in the direction to see a very small horse, or pony, trembling in the shadow of a giant, feline with wings like creature. I made a plan. Hunter, since he was the fastest, would run and grab the child and run with the rest of the team to go get help, while I, who was the strongest, would hold off this over-sized kitty cat. Not the best plan, but it was worth a try.

Hunter ran up and grabbed the kid and started running fast as hell to the rest of the group and went to get help. That left me and this thing to fight.

I tried to strike first, but the thing swiped at me, missing by mere inches. I staggered back, taken away from the sheer speed of this thing. I knew I had to smart.

I walked around in circles, him watching my every move. I was waiting for him to lunge. Then it happened.

He lunged, and I wait till the last-minute.

Second

Milli-second

And moved out-of-the-way, nearly getting trapped under this thing. He fell to the ground, and got even more pissed. I jumped atop him, and tried to get him pinned to the ground, but he was too strong. He went atop me, and pinned me down instead. I was accepting my fate. died by an oversize cat. His claw drew closer as i braced for the impact. The claw landed right on my chest. I howled in the pain. The first day I'm in this fucking cartoon world and I'm gonna die. Amazing.

Even if i do find a way to get out of this things grasp, i will bleed out before i get help. another claw came down and sliced me on the side of my face. I was about to black out. I was dead. I was really going to die. I was closing my eyes, and the last thing i saw was an orange blur running towards me.

**Sorry, short chapter. I will be making longer and better ones soon. Also, if anyone can think of a new title for this story, feel free to tell me it. Thanks for reading, and as always, review!**

**Quote of the day: "Hell yea he's crazy! You should see him in bed!" Me to the referee when he called Timmy crazy.(Yes, these people are real)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Warning: This chapter will be completely in Dreamworld. Some parts will be hard to understand until later chapters. Enjoy!**

**Dreamworld**

****"Wake up, now," The voice I thought I lost some time ago said.

"What? Were am I?" I said and looked around. All I saw was black. Darkness sorounded me. I looked at my hands. I was human again. Thank Christ.

"No, you are dreaming. You are still a horse in the Realworld."

_Did the voice just read my mind? _I thought.

"No, I didn't read your mind," The voice said.

"Oh good... wait a second!"

The voice laughed. "No, I can't read your mind. I'm you. They call me a Sub conscience. In other words, I am your mind."

"So, what are you doing back?"

"Oh, I decided to leave for vacation awhile ago. I took s break with talking to you."

"Oh... ok?"

The voice laughed again. "Wow, I'm upset on how stupid I am. Your will caused me to go. Remember? You stopped listening?"

"If im stupid that means you are too."

"That's funny. I AM you, but I'm your sub conciense. I know what you know now, and what you forgot."

"But if I forgot it, wouldn't you have forgotten it?"

"GOD YOU ARE RETARETED! NO! IM YOUR SUBCONCIENCE! I REMEMBER EVERYTHING!" The voice yelled.

"OK IM SORRY! DONT YELL! MY HEAD HURTS FOR SOME REASON!" I yelled back.

"WOW! No fucking shit your head hurts! You were just attacked by that feline creature! Remember? He sliced your face? Or did you forget already?"

"Yea, yea I remember. Can you just wake me up?"

The voice just laughed.

"Come on, weird voice. Please, just wake me up." I begged.

"First, the 'weird voice' is your voice, retard. Second, call me Cole. You always wanted to be named that, didn't you?"

"Yes, who did you know... never mind."

"Good, you're catching on. And last, I can't wake you up. You are in a medical induced coma."

"How do you-"

"It's tough to explain. It will probably fuck your mind"

"Ok I don't want to my mind-fucked anymore then I already am. So, am I dreaming?"

"Well, yea. Surta. You ARE in Dreamland, as I call it. Here, try to think up something."

"OK," I replied. I got an overly-excited grin.

"I don't think you can do that... It's been so long. Do you even remember what she looks like?"

"I do. Surta. I miss her. A lot."

"I do too. Well, I am you. Listen, don't do it. You think she had her same personality. Her feelings. She won't. She'd be a shell of her former self. She died."

"SHE DIDN'T DIE! SHE JUST LEFT!"

"And that's why you shouldn't do it. She's dead. It was 6 years ago. Just accept it."

"That's it!" I said. I thought and concentrated. It was hard, but I finally did it.

"Hey, what the hell?" The voice, or Cole, said, looking at his hands. I made him a body and put him in it. This Dreamworld is fun! "Dude, why'd you do this?"

I punched him straight in the face. "That's why."

"OWW!" He said, clutching his nose. "Dude, I don't even understand why this hurts! It's a fucking imaginary body and world! FUCK LOGIC!"

"Yea, screw logic. With it, I get trapped in a world full of talking horses. Thanks logic! You really came through for me!"

"I just came back to keep you company. You are probably going to be in this coma for awhile."

"Ugh... It just keeps getting better, doesn't it?"

"Yea. Defiantly. Hey, let's play hockey. That'll get our minds off this."

"Yea, fine."

**END! Strange, wasn't it? You'll understand it sooner or later. Also, starting now, the chapters WILL be getting longer! YAY! Oh yea, I broke my pinkie after slamming a dumbbell on it! HOORAY! PLEASE LEAVE A REVEIW! BYE!**


	4. Chapter 4

**DreamWorld**

****"Dude, how do you always win?" Cole, the voice with a body asked.

"I'm the best goalie in NE, dipshit." I answered.

"Hey, no need for name calling."

"I'm sooooo sorry." I replied sarcastically.

"Wow, I really am a dick, aren't I?"

"Yup, a big one, too." I replied, followed by a horrible feeling in my head. My head started to throb with pain. "Oh shit! What the fuck?"

"Well, it seems you're waking up! Great, I'll be stuck here alone."

"I'm waking up? FINNALY!"

The room started to grow white. I saw my hands changing into... hooves? Fuck, that's right, I'm a horse now. I sighed and let the white surround me. Before I knew it, my eyes opened. I looked around the room, but was stopped when my head started to throb in pain again. I clutched my head. "Fuck! God Damn it hurts!" I yelled in pain. I opened my eyes, painfully, and looked around. I saw I was connected to machines. One looked like an IV Machine, and a heart beat monitor. I sighed. I looked around the room more and noticed my team, and a horse I've never seen before. She was orange, had pretty nice blonde hair topped with a cowboys hat on, and a beautiful pair of emerald eyes. My team sat there with worry in their eyes. Did they not hear me just yell in pain? I sat up and saw my team jumped out of their seats and jump on me like they did when we win the gold. I just took it, even though it hurt my head like a mother fucker. "Sup guys. How's it been?" I asked.

"You mother fucker!"

"Thank god you're alright!"

"Dude, don't do that again!"

I just smiled at them. "Now, now, I wasn't out long. Why are you all greeting me like that?" I asked.

They looked at me with weary grins on their faces.

"Oh, I'll tell him if y'all won't!" I strong, southern accented girl voice said after about a minute of silence.

"Tell me what?" I said

I saw the orange horse get up and walk over to me. "Well, ya was out fo' close to a month"

"FUCK! GOD DAMMIT WHAT THE FUCK!" I said as I got up, and through the pain, punched the wall.

Did I just rage?

"Well, looks like you are awful upset." She said, looking at the wall that I just punched, now sporting a hand (Hoof?) sized hole.

"You think? Not only am I a fucking horse, but I was out for almost a month! A god damn month!" I yelled, on the verge of tears. I stopped, since I was in the presents of my team.

"Um, you're not a horse, you're a pony." She said. My team let out a long groan, like they knew what was going to happen next.

"I'm a pony? Now that is just salt on the wound, aint it?" I sat on the bed, and put my head in my... hooves? I couldn't hold it anymore. I cried. My parents, my scholarship, my career, all gone. Gone, because I'm in a god-damn world inhabited by ponies.

"Hey, it's alright. Your friends already told me tha story. It's awful sad. I really don't know how y'all got here, though. Your friends are staying with me, and you can, too, if you like. I think it's for the best. I already told mah friends about y'all, and one of my friends will have ALOT of questions to ask ya." She said trying to comfort me.

"Twilight?" Hunter asked.

"Yea, she will defiantly have a lot of questions. After-all, you DID promise to tell her when he woke up."

"Yea, I did, didn't I?"

After I got my things together and was cleared to go, we walked to her house. I realized I didn't even know her name. "So, um, what's your name?"

"Mah names Applejack, but you can call me AJ, if ya like." She answered.

"Nice to meet you, Applejack," I replied with a hint of sadness still in my voice. I tried to hide it, but Applejack seemed to hear it.

"Hey now, you shouldn't be sad. Your friends got over it, and, if this is any help, you're quite handsome by pony standards," She said with a wink.

I blushed."Yea, well, I'd rather be handsome by human standards. Hell, I'd rather be home."

"I know it must be awful hard. Your friends the first week were very upset, as well. If there is anything I can do to make you feel better, just tell me." she said. I smiled and said 'Thanks' back. The rest of the walk was quiet. We passed Hundreds of apple trees and ended up at a house. Applejack led the way inside and walked inside. I followed, and saw 5 other ponies I never saw before sitting down, staring at me with curiosity.

And the bombardment of questions began.

**Here's that chapter. Sorry, it's not my best. I had about 5 different ideas of what to write, and I chose this one. Hopefully I made the right choose. Also, I apologize for my awful Applejack. I'm not good with southern accent. Other than that, I hope you enjoyed! As always, Enjoy!**

**(Since I forgot the quote last time, have two!)**

**"Guys, I have a favorite Soy Sauce Company! It's called Lee Cum Chee, and they have a secret recipe! Is it cum? I hope so!" Chen, walking into the locker room.**

**"Hey, I'm a horny 10 year old girl. I'm looking for a 45-55 year old guy. Email me at OperationLisa !" Me on the Xbox to a bunch of NEWBS!**


	5. Chapter 5

**MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS!**

**Oh, and thanks again DarkShroudedSky for your reviews on both my stories! Much appreciated. And I like the one you did on this story. Oh, readers who aren't Dark don't know what I'm talking about? Maybe READ THE DAMN REVEIWS! RARW! Welp, enjoy!**

"What's your world like?"

"What's your world called?"

"What's your name?"

"Do you like parties? I love parties!"

The 5 ponies were blowing questions at me left and right. Well, I should say 4, because a yellow one with a light pink mane was hiding behind her own mane the whole time. "ANOUGH, GOD DAMMIT! LET ME SPEAK, JESUS!"

"Who's God?"

"Yea, and who's Jesus?"

"Are they your rulers like Celestia and Luna?"

"I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO THE FUCK THEY ARE!" I yelled.

"They're our Princesses, silly! Do you have Princesses? Or are they Princes? God and Jesus isn't a mare name. Or is it?" An overly-excited, pink one with curly, pink hair that was darker then the yellow ones, said/yelled.

"Oh my god, stop bombarding me with questions! Let me speak for fucks sake!"

"That's 'fuck'?"

That's it. I lost my mind.

"WILL YOU JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP? I WILL FUCKING THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW IF YOU DONT CLAM THE FUCK DOWN AND LET ME ANSWER ONE QUESTION AT A GOD DAMN TIME!" I yelled in her face.

"Oh, I'm sorry..." She said as she walked and sat next to a Purple... uni-corn? A FUCKING UNI-CORN?!

"HOLY FUCK YOURE A UNI-CORN!" I exclaimed, staring at her.

"Um, yes, I am. Are there no uni-corns were you come from? Your friends were very vague about the world you all came from. They said that they wouldn't talk or answer our questions until you woke up." She said. _I can see why..._ I thought.

"No, they aren't! They don't exist! Only in fucking fairy tales!" I said, still yelling, which was mostly now panic.

"Well, as you can see by me and Rarity," She said, pointing to a white uni-corn with well-pampered hair, "We do exist."

"Great. Next thing you tell me there are Pegasus's **[Pegasi?]** here!"

"Is there anything wrong with Pegasus's? **[Pegasi? Tell me please! I'm going with Pegasus's for now]" **A cyan pony with a pretty damn awesome rainbow mane and tail said in a tomboyish voice said to me, floating right in my face. "And seeing as you are one, you should take that back."

"I'm a what?" I said, looking back and a sow a pair of wings. "Oh, god fucking dammit! I forgot!"

"So, like I said anything wrong with Pegasus's?"

"Get. Out. Of. My. Face." I said, glaring back at her.

"Make me." She said with a grin.

I smiled. She obviously didn't know who she was dealing with. I racked up 7 fights in my hockey career. As a goalie in a youth league, were fighting results in a 2 game suspension, that's pretty impressive. Being a goalie fighting in itself is impressive, but never losing a single fight? That's the icing on the cake.

But, she was a girl. I can't hit a girl. I'll just intimidate her.

"Listen, back the fuck up or ill cut your throat" I said.

She just laughed. "With what? Your hooves?"

"No," I smiled back at her. _Ill repay you, Applejack._ I walked over to the window and smashed it. It hurt like hell, but I fought through it. I picked up a piece off the ground and showed it to her. "With this."

"Y-you w-w-wouldn't," She stuttered.

"No, I won't. But don't make me." I said back to her. "Oh, and Applejack, ill pay you back for your window.

"Ah got a better way ya can pay me back without money." she replied.

"Alright, good.'Cause I'm dirt poor."

The purple one spoke up. "Well, that was... interesting. You guys didn't seem very surprised by what your friend just did." she looked over to my friends.

"No, we really aren't surprised. He does shit like that all the time. He once broke Hunters' new stick over his net, and with the sharp, fiber-glass edge, went to a referee and demanded a goalie interference penalty." Daren said to her.

"What's fiber-glass?" She asked him.

"God dammit, if I hear ONE MORE GODDAMN QUESTION IM GONNA CUT MYSELF!" I yelled.

"Ya know, ah think we've had 'nough questions fo' today. Let's all rest. An' by all, ah mean you." Applejack said looking to me. "And by you, ah mean..."

"Michael. Call me Michael."

"Yes. Ah think ya should rest. It's been a long day. Here, Ah'll take ya to the room." She said, grabbing me with finger-less hooves that seemed to defy physics themselves. She dragged me to a room, put me on the bed, and left.

_This has been a fucked-up day. _I thought to myself as I closed my eyes and drifted asleep.

**Whoa, anger management. Yes, throughout this story, Michael will have anger problems. Oh, and DarkShroudedSky, he will NEVER be OP. Not him or the rest of the team. Oh, and some parts of this story are TRUE, except happened here on Earth. Keep that in mind. :P**

**Oh, and what did you all get for Christmas? Did anyone get about 3 grand in hockey equipment?**

**Didn't think so.**

**Quote of the Day: " Go fuck yourself! And your mother! And your Father! And your brother! And whatever pet you may own at the moment! And don't worry about your sister, I'll fuck her myself." Me to another kid on my team, Dietzle, who hit me in the face with a street-hockey ball by accident. (Those balls are hard!)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Guess what? ANOTHER CHAPTER! That's right, because I was bored. I also think this is my best chapter yet! On either story!**

**Enjoy!**

After a black, dreamless slumber, I awoke. I didn't get out of it, though. I just stared at the ceiling, Thinking. _Why me? Why us? Why? _Those questions were the only thing that was on my mind. I was trapped in this colorful, girly world. My train of thought was stopped when I heard the faint sound of breathing coming from next to me. I looked to my side and saw Applejack lying beside me. I quickly jumped out of the bed. _I just fucking slept with a fucking pony! This would probably be classified as low-class bestiality! _I thought. I ran to the bathroom and shut the door behind me. I looked at myself in the mirror. I didn't see me. All I saw was a white pony with orange hair. I punched the mirror, shattering it. I fell to the floor with tears in my eyes. _Why me, dammit! _I lay on the cold, hard, bathroom floor, wondering. Wondering what to do. I put my hooves to my face, covering my eyes. Look at me. An 18 year old guy with a bright future, crying on the floor. No, I don't have a bright future.

Not anymore.

**~Some Time Later~**

****I still lay on the floor. Tears now dried up on my face. I heard a knock coming from the door.

"Hey, Mike. Come out, man." I heard Tim's voice say.

I didn't reply.

"Really, dude. We gotta piss." I heard Daren.

I still didn't reply.

"Come on, get the fuck out." Hunter said.

I, again, didn't reply.

"Uh, what cha all doin'?" I heard Applejack's voice.

"Michael locked himself in the bathroom and won't come out." Hunter told her.

"Well, why would he do that?"

"I have no idea. He has a whacked personality. He is a goalie."

"Uh, right. Hey, Michael. Come on out. It's OK. Just come on out." Applejack said, knocking on the door.

I didn't reply. In-stead, I got up and went into the tub and closed the shower-curtains.

I heard Applejack mumble something, then I heard a loud bang as the door has kicked open. "Michael, ya made me kick down mah own door. Now ya gotta get out." She said. She swung open the shower curtains and she saw me cowering in the corner with my head in my hooves. "Y'all go away."

"Ow, common! I gotta pee!" Daren whined.

"NOW!"

"Fine..." Daren huffed and went away with the others.

"Now, now." Applejack said, sitting next to me in this small tub. "Why don't we just get out of this tub?"

I just nodded and got out. She pushed me to the bedroom and sat me on the bed. I put my head back in my hooves and quietly cried. She stroked my mane. "It's OK. Ya can let it out." She said with a very motherly voice.

I cried a little more. "Why me? Why did I have to be sent here?"

"Well, it's not bad here."

"I have a bright future. I was going to be famous. I was the best goalie possibly in the USA for Christ sake!"

"Yea, your friends told me. It's OK. It's going to get better. Ah Pinkie Promise."

"I don't even know what that is!" I yelled, which just made me more depressed.

"I promise, it will get better. Ya will find it's not bad here."

"Look, I know you're trying to make me feel better, but you can't. I already got most of your friends to hate me because of what I did to the rainbow- haired chick, and I broke your god damn window and made you break down your door. I think it's best for me to just go. Go some were and never come back."

"They'll forgive ya! Ah promise!"

"No, no more promises. I'm leaving." I said as I got up and headed to the door.

"Oh no ya not!" She said as she grabbed my tail and pulled me down.

"LET GO OF ME!" I yelled.

She pulled me onto the bed and went atop me.

"Get off of me, dammit!" I pleaded. What she did next shocked me. She leaned in and kissed me, full out, on the lips. I didn't know how to react. After a couple seconds, she stopped, and looked at me with a smile on her face. I was still shocked at what she did. In one of my first full days here, I slept in a bed with a southern mare, and was kissed by the very same one. What the fuck is going on?

"W-why did y-you d-do that?" I stuttered.

"Ah was just trying tah make ya stay. Plus, ah needed ya to pay me back somehow, didn't ah?" She said as she got up and flicked her tale in my face. "Ah just hoped it worked. Ya see, ah didn't want ta go to more... drastic measures."

Is a fucking pony hitting on me? "A-are you... H-hitting on me?" I asked.

"That's for ya ta decide," She said, walking out the door.

I was still in shock. A fucking pony is hitting on me! What the fuck?

Ok, so let me think recap. I was transported here after a tree fell on top of me and my team, and we encountered a strange, feline creature. I attacked it, and lost. That put me in a coma for about a month. During that month, in my mind, I played hockey with my sub-conscience. After that, I let my anger get the better of me and threatened a rainbow-haired pony with a piece of glass from a window I broke. Then, after that, I slept in the same bed with an orange, southern talking pony that just kissed me after pulling me onto the bed after I was crying a lot from what I just went through.

Can this get any weirder?

**How did you all like it? Does Applejack like Michael? It sure looks like it!**

_**Note: There will not be a sex scene next chapter or the chapter after that. Thought you all would like to know after... what just happened.**_

**__****As always, review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for the review again, Dark! They all make me feel warm on the inside! Don't worry about the quote, though. Just don't :P**

I still lay in the bed, shocked, deep in thought. I was kissed by a pony. A fucking pony! Now, that really classifies as bestiality! Ugh, I feel like a fucking creep! You know what? I should just forget about it. Let it go. That's right. Don't let it get to you, Michael. Just let it go.

My deep thoughts were halted when Applejack slapped me. _Hard._

I was about to yell at her, but before I could even get a word off, she grabbed my arm (Fore-leg?) and dragged me out of the room. I struggled to get free, but to no avail. I saw a smirk on her face. Was she enjoying this? She dragged me outside and to the barn. She let me go and I was, finally, able to stand up on my own. "What the fuck?" I yelled at her. "Why the fuck did you drag me outside?"

"Ah dragged ya outside 'cause ah need ya ta pay me back for the window an' door somehow." She explained.

"I wasn't the one who broke your god damn door! You did!"

"Yea, but ah would've had ta do that if ya didn't lock yaself in there" She said.

"You have a point."

"Of course ah have a point. Ah also decided that the kiss ah gave ya will cover half the damages," She said with a smirk.

Fuck! She brought it up! "About that kiss..."

"What 'bout it?"

"It wasn't... right. It made me feel like a creep."

She looked confused. "Why?"

"Because I'm not from here. That's fucking bestiality were imp from."

She put her head down. "Oh." She said in a very sad voice.

_Fuck! Good job jackass! You made a girl sad!_ I thought. I had to change the subject. _Fast!_

"So, what is this job I'm supposed to do?" I asked, hopefully getting off that subject.

"All ya need ta do is buck them apples out of the trees an' into the buckets," She explained. She walked over to a tree already set up with buckets underneath it. She faced her rump to the tree. "This is all ya need ta do," She said, pulling back her hind-legs and bucking the tree with what seemed like little force. All the apples fell down and into the buckets. "See, it's easy."

During her demonstration, I noticed something. She had a tattoo on her flank. The tattoo was of three apples. _Of course. _I thought. "Um, Applejack? Why do you have a tattoo on your flank?" I asked.

"This?" She said, pointing to her tattoo. "That's mah cutie- mark. Ponies get it when we find our special talent. Now, ah have a question for ya"

"Yea?"

"Why were ya looking at mah flank?" She asked with a smile.

I blushed. "I, um, what just, erm."

She walked up to me and put a hoof to my mouth. "shhhh, don't answer. Ya could'a just asked." She said, waving her ass in my face. I was now blushing profusely.

"Erm, don't I need to, um, get my job done?" I spit out.

She smiled. "That's right. Now, go to a tree that set and try."

I nodded and went to a tree already with buckets underneath it. _This is going to be easy._ I thought. I positioned myself under the tree like her, and pulled back my legs. I bucked the tree as hard as I can. Only 2 apples fell down.

Fuck!

I bucked the tree again, and only one apple fell down this time.

FUCK!

I heard Applejack laughing at me. Now I was really pissed. I bucked again, anger fueling my hit. This time, no apples fell.

Now I was really pissed. I turned to the tree and punched it with all might. I heard the cracking of my wrist (Or whatever it's called in a pony) and yelled in pain. I fell down in pain. Then, to add insult to injury, the apples on the tree fell down on top of me. By now, Applejack was laughing her ass off. I crawled out and yelled to her. "Bring me to the fucking hospital!"

That just made her laugh even more. I sighed, pain throbbing through my fore-legs.

_I'm going to be in pain for a long time..._ I thought as Applejack was still laughing.

**How was that? Sorry, it was short. Don't hate me! As always, review!**

**Quote of the Day: "HEIL HITLER!" Chucky to Daren, a Jew. (Don't worry, it was a joke.)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Here! Have a long chapter!**

****We finally made it to the hospital, which looked a lot like one's back home. I struggled to make it there walking on 3 legs because Applejack was laughing hysterically the whole way. We walked in, Applejack still laughing, but not as loud, and went to the front desk. "Um, I just broke my wrist or whatever in this fore-leg," I said, lifting up my right fore-leg (Right? Fore-leg?).

"OK," Said the mare behind the counter, "How did you break it?

That was like pushing a button on Applejack. She started laughing hysterically again. The mare behind the counter looked at her with an odd face. I sighed. "I don't really what to talk about it," I told her.

"OK, I understand. I can tell it must be pretty embarrassing," She looked at Applejack. I blushed. "Hey, weren't you the one in here in the coma?" She asked.

"Yea, yea I was," I said, annoyed, "But as you can see, I'm not in it anymore, and i would _love _it if i can see a docter, like, now!"

"Oh, of course! Sorry!" She apologized.

After that, the docter saw me and wrapped- up most of my fore- leg (God, I hope that's right) and gave me crutches. I got used to walking on them and Applejack and I made our way back to her house. She since stopped laughing, but still had a stupid grin on her face. I was annoyed at it at first, but i got over it. When we got to her place, i sat on the couch, and she sat next to me. "I have a question for you," I started.

"Yea?"

"We_re are my friends? I haven't seen them since this morning," I asked._

_"Oh them? Well, let's see if ah remember their names. Hunter is with Rainbow Dash practicing flying," She explained._

_"Rainbow Dash is the one with a rainbow mane, right?"_

_"Eeeyup! Daren is with Fluttershy helping with her animals."_

_"Let me guess, Fluttershy was the one hiding behind her mane the whole time and freaked when I broke your window?"_

_"Correct!"_

_"Reminds me, how am I going to pay you back now?"_

_"Oh, ah has an idea," She said with a grin. _

_"Oh, u-um," I stuttered, "s-so continue."_

_"Right. Well, Timmy is with Rarity, the uni-corn with a well-nourished mane."_

_"Alright."_

_"Chucky is w_ith Pinkie. Ah betcha can tell who Pinkie was."

"Yea, I remember _her_." I said, remembering back to yesterday.

"An' Chen is with Twilight, the Purple uni-corn, who is teaching him, magic."

"Whoa whoa whoa, magic?"

"Yea, magic. What, is there no magic were you come from?"

"Well, some will say there is, but to me, magic is just a figment of your imagination. If you believe it, every little lucky thing that happens will be magic to you. You will live your life being optimistic and happy, but you won't know real pain. You live your life in happiness, but happiness isn't real. It's all fake. It's a lie. It's how you think, not a real thing. I don't believe in magic. I don't believe in optimism. I don't believe in happiness. Not anymore. I live in the real world. But now, now I'm not even me. Now I'm a fucking pony. Now, my life is ruined. My life was set. I was going to college, and probably going pro in hockey. Now that's ruined. Everyone I love is gone. My family, gone. The only good thing out of this is that my friends are still here with me. They seem to be taking this awfully well. I, though, could never. Never," I said that, holding back some tears. I looked at Applejack, and some tears were in her eyes. _Great, you made a girl cry._ I thought. "I'm going, and I'm not sure I'm coming back." I said to here, walking away. I heard her call after me, but I just kept walking.

I kept walking or trotting or whatever the fuck they call it. I eventually found a hill as the moon rose above the land. I reached the top and lay, moonlight my only cover. I, then, did something I thought I'd never do. I sang **[That's right, mother fuckers! :P But, no. His singing wont be a super major part of this story.] **I sang my favorite song. Bartender, by Rehab.

"Bartender I really did it this time

Broke my parole to have a good time

When I got home it was 6 am

The door was locked so I kicked it in

She was trippin' on the bills

I think she was high on some pills

She threw my shit out into the yard

Then she called me a bum and slapped me real hard

And in my drunken' stuper I did what I shoulda' never done

And now I'm sittin' here, talkin' to you, drunk and on the run

I'm sittin' at a bar on the inside

Waitin' for my ride on the outside

She stole my heart in the trailer park

So I jacked the keys to her fuckin' car

Crashed that piece of shit and stepped away

You know mo I'll probably get ten years

So just give me beers til' they get here

Yeah I know the sun is comin' up

And ya'll are probably gettin' ready for closin' up

But I'm tryin' to dry my soul I'm tired of this life on a dirt road

And everything that I love is gone and I'm tired of hangin' on

She got me sittin' at a bar on the inside waitin' for my ride on the outside

She stole my heart in the trailer park

So I jacked the keys to her fuckin' car

Crashed that piece of shit and stepped away

**[RAP!]**

I guess it was meant to be

Romance is misery

So much for memories

And now I'm headed for the penitentiary

See me on TV

The next cop series I am danger

I guess I shoulda' did somethin' 'bout my anger

But I never learned

Real things that don't concern I pour kerosene on everything

I love to watch it burn

You know it's my fault but I wasn't happy it was over

She threw a fit so I crashed that piece of shit nova

**[End RAP]**

And now I'm goin' back again

Back to the pen to see my friends

And when we all pile out that county van

They're gonna ask me where I've been

I've been at a bar on the inside

And I'm waitin' for my ride on the outside

She stole my heart in the trailer park

So I jacked the keys to her fuckin' car

Crashed that piece of shit and then stepped away

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na

Well I'm sittin' at a bar on the inside

And I'm waitin' on my ride on the outside

You know I crashed that piece of shit

And then I stepped away

Yeah, I stepped away

You know I crashed that piece of shit

And then I stepped away..."

I stopped singing. I bet you could tell why I love that song, right? Well, after that, I just lay at the top of the hill, looking at the moon. I was at ease, until I heard ruffling in a bush a top the hill. "Fuck..." I sighed. "Alright, whoever you are, get the fuck out before I jump on the bush and beat the living shit out of you," I said, not even getting up.

The person... erm, pony... I saw was none other than the orange, apple-bucking Applejack. "Uh, hiya..."

"OK, no shit. I guess you followed me here, and heard me sing. Now, you're going to say it was 'beautiful' and try to sneak a kiss, as you wish it's happen. Am I correct?" I said, looking over to her.

"Um..." She said, with a bright-red blush. "Y-yes..." She hesitated.

"Of course."

"How did ya know? That ah did that?" She asked.

"Well, I didn't know you followed me, but I've read enough stories and seen enough T.V. to know shit like this would happen."

"Oh, um, I don't suppose Ah'll get that kiss?"

I thought about it. My life was tearing at the seams already, what else do I have to lose? "Sure, why not."

She let out an 'EEP!' and dove on me and kissed me. She locked-lips and, with her a top me, I kissed back.

I have nothing else to lose, right?

**Like it? Well, I have a request! I need a new name for this story. PLEASE, ANYONE, GIVE ME NEW NAMES! Well, have a good one!**

**Quote of the Day: "Awww! I got my tit's wet! Don't look at me! I'm a fucking whore!" Fat-ass Daren after spilling water on with fat-ass man tits in the locker-room.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry I didn't update yesterday or Saturday I went to Pennsylvania on Saturday for a family Christmas party (Yea, that late) and on the way home, i got a fucking flat tire. And the tires were brand-new, too! Fuck you, Pepboys and your shit tires! I didn't update yesterday because i have shit to do.**

**Well, enjoy!**

She broke the kiss with a victorious grin, which i couldn't stand. "Um, why do you have that stupid grin?" I asked.

"Ah think ya can guess," She replied. "Now, let's head back before it's too late. There is somethin' waitin' for ya back in town."

"What?"

"Ya gotta wait fo' it. It's a surprise," She said. I shrugged, and with that, we left the hill. She still had that grin on her face. Not-so-victorious, but more sly then anything.

The fuck is the surprise?

***Ponyville, Sugercube Corner* **_**[Third-Person]**_

The mane six, (Excluding Applejack) and the remaining Hockey team from a different universe were setting up for a surprise party for Michael. Of course, this was all Pinkies' idea, and, defying physics even more, was putting up banners and streamers throughout the party-area. Twilight and Chen were using their magic, Chen doing it more for practice, to hang up a huge banner (Made by Pinkie) that, in red lettering, said 'Welcome to Ponyville!' The gigantic banner was being hung on the back wall of the room, showing proudly the words it possesses. Hunter and Rainbow Dash were busy blowing up balloons, and to no-one's surprise, they were having a contest on who could blow up the most balloons before Michael came here. Chuckey was in the back making sweets (With Pinkie's permission) for the party, while Timmy and Rarity were in the back, talking, due to them having nothing else to do after they set up the chairs and tables. Fluttershy was with Daren, being talked out of a shy episode she experienced. Pinkie, using what seemed like magic to teleport, but was only her physics-defying antics, went to the window and checked outside. "Get ready, every pony! He's coming!" She screamed. With that, everyone hid behind anything big enough to not be seen. Pinkie rushed to turn off the light and disappeared out of thin air. They were ready. Even though Daren's warning about what happened last surprise-party they threw Michael, when he got so scared he punched Daren in the nose, not breaking it, but causing blood to rush out, Pinkie still insisted, and just said that no-one hid by the door.

Apparently Hunter couldn't hear her instructions, and he was positioned under the table closest to the door.

Michael and Applejack approached the walk-way leading to the door, Michael gawking at the Sugercube corner's Ginger-bread house design that looked extremely edible. Applejack, who knew about the party, was smart and stayed back a good 10 feet from Michael, who hadn't noticed. He started to open the door, and the group inside got ready.

*****_**Michael's POV***_

I started to the edible-looking houses door. With hoof-grabbing physics i still don't understand, i grabbed the knob and opened the door.

I swear i saw my life flash before my eyes...

My team and the girls whom are Applejack's friends jumped in front of me, yelling 'SURPRISE!' In a panic, i swung my fist, hitting a soft and squishy spot that i can easily recognize as flesh. I heard a yelp and laughing coming from my team-mates. All but one was laughing. The one not laughing was Hunter, who received the full-force of my blow. The girls, i heard, were chuckling a little when they heard Hunter's next words.

"Holy fucking cock-jerking anti-Christ monkey whores!" He yelled in pain. I couldn't help but laugh myself. After a couple seconds of laughing, i helped him up off the floor. I caught a look at his face, and saw a huge black-and-blue mark sporting on his cheek. "Dude, I'm sorry! You know better than to scare me after last time!" I said, looking over to Daren, who nodded.

"It's alright," he replied, rubbing his cheek," I should've known better."

"Oh, oh! Were you surprised? Were ya? Were ya?" Pinkie ran up to me and asked.

"Well, take a wild guess," I said, looking over to Hunter.

"Oh, goodie! I've planned games and have snacks and more!" She said with her super enthusiasm.

"All right, all right. I got it. But now, i gotta sit down."

"Okie dokie lokie!" She said and bounced away.

I made my way to the nearest chair while the others were dancing to the music, which was dub-step. It was that 'Wub-a-dub-dub' shit. I sat down and almost immediately, Applejack sat next to me and scooted over to get close to me. I smiled. She clearly liked me, no doubt. "Well, hello there," I said, looking at her.

"Hiya!" She replied.

And i wasn't at all shocked on what she did next...

**CLIFF-HANGER! That's right! Sorry if this chapter was short. I was backed up in shit and the flat needed to be repaired and i had COD to play, so I'm sorry. REMEMBER! I NEED A NEW TITLE!**

**Quote of the Day: "Dude, are you a fucking brony are something?" Me, asking Daren who had a Rainbow Dash emblem on Black Ops II. **


	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry for the lack of an update for anyone who cares. My finger is fucked up more than I thought. The tip bone of it is in half, and if it moves anymore, it will be messed the fuck up and won't heal. Yea...**

**Oh, and I will not be updating my other story for awhile. I wasn't serious about it at first, and still am not 100%. **

**Without further a-do, here's the chapter!**

****She jumped on my lap (Right? A lap on a pony? Gah, this fucking pony body and its confusing shit!) And swung her arms around me. She has surprisingly heavy. She buried her head into my chest. I looked around and saw my friends holding in laughs with their han-... HOOVES... on their mouths. "Fuck off, ass waffles. There is nothing wrong with this."

"Yea, well, when you're a fucking human, it's called bestiality," Hunter said.

"Whoa, i didn't fuck her or anything," I replied.

"What does 'fuck' mean?" I heard Applejack ask into my chest.

"Nothing. And we're probably going to be here awhile, so what do i care."

"That reminds me," Twilight chimed in," We are all going to see Princess Celestia tomorrow!"

"Wait, you didn't ask us if we wanted to go," Daren said.

"Oh, so you all have something to do tomorrow?" She asked to no reply," I thought so. Anyways, the train leaves early in the morning, so this party can't last too late."

"Oh, i forgot you're my mother," Chen joked.

"I don't think YOU would mind that," She replied with a smile. The guys and me, excluding Chen, laughed at her comeback. Chen just blushed. "OK, so let's just enjoy this party!"

The rest of the party had nothing exciting happen, other than when Hunter dunked Tim's head into the punch bowl because he walked into him. That was pretty funny.

The party ended with Twilight, Pinkie, and Rainbow volunteering to clean up after the party. The guys and I went with Applejack back to the farm, with Applejack walking extremely close to me. My team, i could hear, were still chuckling at this. I smiled. _Sooner or later, whether it is death or not, I'm leaving this place. _I thought.

We arrived to the house and went to our designated rooms, me with Applejack. I swallowed hard at the thought of sleeping with another pony again, but it's that or being tired while seeing the only perso-... PONY... who could be able to send us back. I got into the bed and faced my back to her, who was already under the covers. I didn't bother putting on the covers over me, since the fur i had kept me pretty warm. I lay in the bed and i felt a fore-leg reach over me. _Maybe i shouldn't have let her kiss me... _I thought, _I probably led her on._ I let out a very light sigh and closed my eyes.

***Morning***

****I awoke to a yell. "Wake up! We need to leave!" I heard Applejack's unmistakable voice yell.

"Ugh, alright, I'm up," I moaned. I got out of bed with my eyes half open and looked out the window. I saw that the sun was just in the sky._ Must be like 6:00 AM _I thought.

"Get ready. We leave in 'bout 5 minutes," She said.

"What? Why didn't you awake me earlier?"

"Ah didn't feel like it," She said with a smirk.

"Wow, that's horrible..." I replied. I walked out of the room and went into the bathroom and splashed water on my face. I took in a deep breath and smelt BO. _I needed to shower _I thought. But, obviously, i had no time. I sighed, and walked out and to the living room, were everyone, including the girls, were." Hi everyone! I smell like shit because Applejack woke me up 5 fucking minutes ago, but don't mind me!" I said with heavy sarcasm. My team and Twilight were chuckling a little. "Um, Twilight, why are you laughing?" I asked. "I understand my friends, but why you?"

"Your friend here," She said, pointing to Chen," Told me what your 'Curses' meant. There are quite a bit of curses, i do say."

I face-hoofed. "Why. Would. You. Do. That."

"Don't worry, i won't tell anyone," She assured, creating an 'Awww' within her friends. "Alright, enough talking! We need to go, every pony! We need to go now!"

We talked no longer and rushed out the door. After the walk to the station, we got on the train and headed for Canterlot, were the Castle was. As suspected, Applejack sat with me. Well, not with me, but on top of me. After the pretty long ride, we made it. We walked through the pretty fancy looking town with stares from some snobby looking ponies. I didn't care, though. They have no power over me, and quite frankly, they could fuck off. After a shit ton of walking, we arrived at the gates of the castle, guarded by 2 guards. "Halt!" The one on the right started. "State your name."

"Twilight Sparkle. The Princess is expecting us." Twilight replied. They nodded and opened the gates. We walked in and found the throne room. A top the thrown was whom i guessed was Princess Celestia. She was noticeably taller than the other ponies, and seemed to be a uni-corn. Well, I thought that until i saw that she also had a pair of wings. I was dumbfounded, but got over it since she was the Princess and i was in a weird world inhabited by ponies, so anything's possible. She had a very very light pink coat with a mane of four colors; Magenta, purple, green(ish), and blue(ish). Her hair seemed to wave in this airless room. "Princess Celestia!" Twilight yelled and ran to her. She hugged her and Celestia spoke.

"Twilight, what have i told you about doing this," She said in a very motherly voice.

"Sorry," Twilight replied, backing away.

"Ah, i see you brought the humans," Celestia said, looking to us.

"Uh, yes, your highness. We are the 'humans'," I said, walking up.

"Hey, who died and made you king, Mike? I'm the captain, i go up," Hunter complained.

"Shut up. Don't is a pussy and just let me do this," I replied. I heard Twilight and Celestia chuckle. "And you know curses too..."

"Yes, i do. And i ask, what is that smell," Celestia asked.

I smiled sheepishly," yea, Applejack woke me late and i couldn't shower."

Celestia chuckled a little more, "I see. Well, I guess there is a single question on your mind right now. Do ask."

"Well, it's probably the question you think it is. Is there a way for us to go back?" I asked.

"I'm sorry to say, but there is no way to get you all back home," She replied, "But, i can make you all humans once more."

"Now, wouldn't that be counter- productive?" I asked.

"Dude, shut up! Princess, we would love that." Daren said.

"So it be," She said. She closed her eyes and my team and i were engulfed in a magic aurora. I felt a massive pain surging through my body, and i soon after blacked out.

Dreamland, here we go again...

**Not my best chapter, but hey, i needed to update. Please review! And PLEASE give me a new name for this story!**

**PLEASE!**

**Quote of the Day: " She knows how he likes it!" Me, after we were teasing Chuckey on with one of his girlfriends did he use last night; Lefty, or righty.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry for the long update **_**again. **_**Shit's been crazy for me the past weeks. Not good crazy either. Well, enjoy!**

*******Third Person***

****The spell worked perfectly. The humans- turned- ponies were now back in their original forms. All of them lay unconscious from their painful endeavor they just went through. Re-arranging bones is a pretty painful experience. The humans were gaining looks of mostly fear from the ponies in the room. Twilight and Celestia are the only one's looking in wonder. The rest, especially Fluttershy, were painfully afraid at the creatures before them. They were at least twice the size of regular ponies, (And just smaller then Celestia). They had very little fur. It was only on top of their heads and some of them had some around their mouths, beards, perhaps. They wore cloths, and much to the disgust of Rarity, that were very shabby. Sweatpants, some black some grey, and a heavy sweatshirt, again, some black and some grey. They seemed bi-pedal, and saw they had sharper teeth then most ponies, courtesy of one of their open mouth. They must be either carnivores or omnivores. Since they ate the food ponies at as they were ponies, they were most likely omnivores. They had claw-like things on the end of their fore- legs, but they couldn't tell what was at the end of the hind-legs due to them wearing shoes.

Celestia was rather intrigued. More so then Twilight. These were a completely new species to Equestria. From what Twilight had told her they were harmless, but that doesn't mean it's so. From their looks they seem like danger. She had many questions to ask them. Questions about their world and magic and such. None of them had a horn or wings, so magic may not be something they knew. From what she learned from Twilight, they weren't even from this world. This whole thing is very intriguing, and she wanted them awake soon. She knew she had to be patient, but who could you when you have so much to ask? She couldn't even imagine what they were dreaming of.

***Dreamland***

****"NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! FUCK NO! STAY AWAY YOU STUPID CUNT!"

"Hehehehehehehehe!"

"BACK OFF! NO NO NO NOOO! GOD DAMMIT!"

"And that's why you don't take a gun to a knife fight."

"You have mods, don't you Mike?"

"How would i have mods with a fucking knife in BO2 in my fucking dreams?"

"Whatever. I'm getting you next time."

"I got you 7 times in a row..."

"And it won't be 8."

"Hey, guess what?"

"What?"

"8."

"Wha- DAMMIT!"

***Out of Dreamworld. 3rd person***

****Should she wake them up? No, that would be rude. Or would it? What if they were having a nightmare? Would that be good that she woke them up? Is it worth the wait?

_Yes, i should _the thought came to her mind.

_But it'd be rude._

_But i do have so much to ask._

__Her mind battled for a minute. She ended it with just letting them wake up for their selves. She knew she shouldn't leave them here on the floor. She would take them to a room. She would ask the 6 to stay the night. They probably have questions to ask as well.

And she did.

She took them to separate rooms and did the same to the 6 mares. She walked to her room, her mind racing. New creatures from a new world. There is so much to learn.

Too much.

**I know a really short chapter. It's the best I can do right know. Like i said I'm in some crazy shit. I'll try to update as soon as i can. Hope you enjoyed! Review, as always!**

**Quote of the Day: "I swear to fucking Christ you will be the one on the team to be homeless while you're older and fuck a couch or a fucking pot with a flower just too full fill you sexual needs because you are the gayest faggot I've ever seen. I don't care if that didn't make since. Fuck you too." You don't want to know...**


	12. Chapter 12

**HEY! I CHANGED THE NAME! Yup, with no one's help. Shmeh.**

**P.S. I fixed the errors and mistakes on chapter one, so yea.**

**Well, enjoy this story!**

*******Michael's POV*******

I woke up in a very regal looking room. It was bright and colorful. _Full of life._ I got off the bed, which was extremely comfortable and huge, and stretched out my arms and legs. I cracked my neck and looked to the window, with was being covered by very expensive looking curtains. No light shone through, so i guessed it was night time. I cracked my knuckles and... _Wait a sec... _FUCK YEA! IM HUMAN AGAIN!

I jumped up and down like a kid in a candy shop with a 20 dollar bill. _IT WORKED! THE FUCKING WORKED! Now, all i need to do is to find a way home._ I walked around, happy to be off four legs finally. I smiled widely and went to the bathroom. It was pretty damn amazing. It had gold-plated sinks and a gold plated toilet. It would make even the poorest of men feel like the king of the world if they shit on there. I pissed, washed my face and showered. I was surprised to find i had my cloths, but whatever. Logic isn't really something i should be caring about anymore. Apparently it doesn't exist here, and a prime example is Pinkie. I showered with the fruitiest shampoo I've ever smelled, and got out. I dried off, even though the towel was a tad small, and got re-dressed. I walked to the door and was about to open it when i saw a very royal note hanging to the door. I took it down and started reading it.

_Dear Guest,_

_If you wake up before the sun rises, please refrain from leaving your room. There are plenty books to read until sun rise, and I'm certain you would like to learn more about this land. Please enjoy the collection, and enjoy your stay._

_Princess Celestia_

_P.S. Come morning, if it is ok with any one of you, I would like to observe you._

I put the note down on the bed. _Well, looks like eating is out of the question._ I sat back on the bed and looked at the book cases that covered most of the walls. _How didn't i see this before? _I took out a book and started reading it. It was called _The Basics of Magic. _I read the first few pages and i swear it was written in a different language. I put that book down and read a few history books. I learned some bull shit about the princess, Celestia, being the one to raise the moon. I also learned she has a sister, Luna, who raises the moon. Apparently she was imprisoned on the moon for x amount of years (I don't remember, it's a book. I don't really pay attention.). I also learned of a guy named Discord, who was imprisoned in stone by something's called the _Elements of Harmony _or some shit. I got board from reading and opened the curtains. Just as i suspected, night. The sky was beautiful. The stars shone brightly throughout the sky. I never really seen stars myself before. I lived in or close to Boston my whole life, and the sky, even at night, was always light. I noticed that there was some constellations that were able to be seen back home (Well, in the planetarium field trips in middle school). Yea, logic is fucked up.

I opened the window and sat on the windowsill. I looked up at the stars and the moon that was brightly hanging in the darkness of the sky. I just looked up until my neck hurt. When it did, i cracked it and continued to look up.

Until a shadow-like horse figure presented itself in front of my eyes.

I screamed and fell back into the room. I got up and cracked my neck. _Again._ I looked outside the window and looked around for whatever that was. I saw nothing. I shrugged and turned around. When i turned around i was face to face with the same shadowy figure. I, again, screamed and turned around to run, and i did.

But i didn't really make it far.

I ran right out the open window because I'm just that stupid. I fell down a pretty damn high distance and braced myself for impact. _This doesn't classify as suicide, does it? I don't want to go to hell... _I closed my eyes just before i was about to hit the ground, but i didn't feel any impact. I opened my eyes slowly, and saw i was back in my room. I looked around and saw the same figure that almost killed me. I knew better then to panic this time. I kept calm and just walked up to it. With further examination, it wasn't a shadow. I should've of figured that at first, but logic, well, you know. I saw that it was indeed a pony, but a bigger than most. He/she wasn't as tall as Celestia, though. Just a tad smaller. He/she was a deep blue, pretty cool, and had close to equally blue eyes. By the mane, I'm guessing it was a girl. It was long and constantly flowing, like Celestia's, and had a horn, as well as wings. _Oh, it's probably the other princess. What was her name? Lunar? Lunist? Luna? Yea, Luna! _"Hello, strange creature. Please do not be afraid, as i am Princess Luna," She said, confirming my suspicion.

"Well, you know how to make quite the entrance," I replied.

"I am sorry; I was not expecting to scare you. Please except my apology."

"Well, considering you just saved me from almost certain death, I'm guessing i can let it slide. Why did you do that, anyway?"

"Well, I don't usually sleep in the night time, since i raise the moon," I giggled a bit at that. "What is it?"

"Nothing, go on."

"Please, do tell."

I thought for a second. _I don't want to offend a princess. Should i? You know what? YOLO! _"OK, well, you said you raise the moon."

"Correct."

"Well, that's complete bull-shit." I said, bluntly.

"I don't know what 'shit' is, so please tell."

I sighed. "Bull-shit is another word forsomething being untruthful. For example, you raising the moon is untruthful can also be said as you rising the moon is bull-shit."

That got her angry. **"HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF LIEING?" **She yelled in a booming voice.

I kept calm. "Well, i am sorry for angering you, but from where i come from, we learned all about how the sun and moon, quote on quote, 'rises.'"

She smiled. "Well, you are from i different world, am i correct?"

"Well, yes. At least i think i am."

"And how should you know if the same that applies to your world apply here?" She got me. It was true. How was i supposed to know that how to moon rises and such is the same here? Logic doesn't really exist here, anyway.

"Ya got me." I said. She smiled.

She looked me up and down, observing me. I noticed that she was about my height. _She aint no pony, she's a fucking horse. I mean, I'm 6-8, so she is pretty tall for a pony. _**_  
_**"You are quite the strange creature, aren't you?" She said, looking back up.

"Well, I guess i could be called relatively normal." **[Huh? Huh? Used the title in my story? BOO YA!] **

She chuckled a bit. "I see."

"Hey, you still didn't answer my question. Why did you come to me in the first place?"

"Ah, since i do not sleep at night, i usually fly around, looking for some pony to talk too. I saw you and thought i could."

"I see. Well tell me. Why would a princess need to talk to someone like me?"

"Well, you see, i don't have many friends." That got me a bit shocked.

"What?"

"Yes, indeed. Not only due to me mostly being awake only during the night, most ponies are..." She trailed off, saying something very quiet.

"What was that?"

She mumbled again.

"One more time. Come on, louder."

"Afraid of me." I heard.

"How? Why would they be afraid of you?"

"Well, i was once banished to the moon." She answered.

Oh yea, that's right. I read about it in one of the books. She was someone called Nightmare Moon or something. "For the Nightmare Moon thing?"

She swallowed. "Y-yes..."

I could see she was lonely. "Well, your highness, i shall be your friend, of course, if you want a 'creature' like me as a friend."

She smiled widely. "Yes, i would like that."

I smiled back. "Come sit, let's talk."

She happily did as i said. I then realized something. _If i had my cloths, that means i have my... _I dug in my pockets, and found it. I found my phone.

God, i was so happy. I was about to scream in happiness, but i refrained, since i was in the presence of the princess. "What is that?" She asked, looking at the white iPhone.

"This is my phone. It can make calls, send messages that arrive in seconds, and play games and music."

She looked intrigued. "It can do all that?"

"Yup! I also have over 2000 songs on here. Most of them i never play, but whatever."

Her eyes widened. "2-2000 songs? On that small thing?"

"Yea. What don't believe me?"

She smiled. "I can't say i do."

"Well then, i guess I'll have to show you." I went into my music and was about to play 'Nightmare' by Avenged Sevenfold, but i thought that would be a bit cruel. _'Welcome to the Black Parade'? Nah. Hmmm, what song. Oh, i know! _I scrolled to the song, and picked it. I tried to pick a song that wasn't too bad to play. I pressed play and on came 'Buried Alive,' by Avenged Sevenfold. **[R.I.P. Rev. FoREVer.]**

**"Take the time just to listen  
When the voices screaming are much too loud  
Take a look in the distance  
Try and see it all**

Chances are that ya might find  
That we share a common discomfort now  
I feel I'm walking a fine line  
Tell me only if it's real

Still I'm on my way  
On and on it goes  
Vacant hope to take

[Chorus]  
Hey I can't live in here for another day  
Darkness has kept the light concealed  
Grim as ever  
Hold onto faith as I dig another grave  
Meanwhile the mice endure the wheel  
Real as ever  
And it seems I've been buried alive

I walked the fields through the fire  
Taking steps until I found solid ground  
Followed dreams reaching higher  
Couldn't survive the fall  
Much has changed since the last time  
And I feel a little less certain now  
You know I jumped at the first sign  
Tell me only if it's real

Memories seem to fade  
On and on it goes  
Wash my view away

[Chorus]  
Hey I can't live in here for another day  
Darkness has kept the light concealed  
Grim as ever  
Hold onto faith as I dig another grave  
Meanwhile the mice endure the wheel  
Real as ever  
And I'm chained like a slave  
Trapped in the dark  
Slammed all the locks  
Death calls my name  
And it seems I've been buried alive

Take you down now  
Burn it all out  
Throw you all around  
Get your fucking hands off me  
What's it feel like?  
Took the wrong route  
Watch it fall apart  
Now you're knockin' at the wrong gate

For you to pay the toll  
A price for you alone  
The only deal you'll find  
I'll gladly take your soul

While it seems sick  
Sober up quick  
Psycho lunatic  
Crushing you with hands of fate  
Shame to find out when it's too late  
But you're all the same  
Trapped inside inferno awaits

Evil thoughts can hide  
I'll help release the mind  
I'll peel away the skin  
Release the dark within

This is now your life  
Strike you from the light  
This is now your life  
Die buried alive [X2]

This is now your life  
Die buried alive"

The song ended, and i think i saw a tear on her face. It wasn't one of sorrow, though. It was one of happiness. I smiled. _I chose well. _"That was... beautiful."

"I knew you'd like it. You just seem like that type who would."

"May i please hear another?"

"Sure." I said, and i put on 'Die for You' by Pennywise. It seemed like another she would like.

**[It's a great song. Look it up.]**

Again, a good response. "Music from your world is just... amazing." she said after the some finished.

"Thanks. Now, i leave this up to you. We can listen to music all night, or talk. I don't mind. If we listen to music, we can talk tomorrow. So?"

She thought for a second, and answered. "I would love to listen to more music, if that's ok."

I smiled, and nodded. I put on my favorite playlist. My 'Before game' playlist. "Now, some of these songs are different than the others, so yea. If you don't like a song, please just say so." She nodded, and i played the first song, 'Franco Un-American' by NOFX.

Now, this playlist was a cluster fuck of different music. One song was 'Pay to Cum' while another was 'IDGAFOS' **[All songs belong to their respective groups/ persons.]**

She never once asked to change the song. We went through about 38 songs. Ranging from the Dropkick Murphy's to Reel Big Fish, The Offspring to Red Hot Chili Peppers. Then there was the last song.

It was my all-time favorite (Well, Your Girlfriend Sucks by Reel Big Fish was a close second). It was Bob Marley, Redemption Song. This is an amazing song. I love it, and this is probably the perfect song for Luna.

**"Old pirates, yes, they rob I;**  
**Sold I to the merchant ships,**  
**Minutes after they took I**  
**From the bottomless pit.**  
**But my hand was made strong**  
**By the 'and of the Almighty.**  
**We forward in this generation**  
**Triumphantly.**  
**Won't you help to sing**  
**This songs of freedom**  
**'Cause all I ever have:**  
**Redemption songs;**  
**Redemption songs.**

**Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery;**  
**None but ourselves can free our minds.**  
**Have no fear for atomic energy,**  
**'Cause none of them can stop the time.**  
**How long shall they kill our prophets,**  
**While we stand aside and look? Ooh!**  
**Some say it's just a part of it:**  
**We've got to fulfill the book.**

**Won't you help to sing**  
**This songs of freedom-**  
**'Cause all I ever have:**  
**Redemption** songs;  
**Redemption songs;**  
**Redemption songs.**  
**-**  
**Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery;**  
**None but ourselves can free our mind.**  
**Wo! Have no fear for atomic energy,**  
**'Cause none of them-a can-a stop-a the time.**  
**How long shall they kill our prophets,**  
**While we stand aside and look?**  
**Yes, some say it's just a part of it:**  
**We've got to fulfill the book.**  
**Won't you have to sing**  
**This songs of freedom? -**  
**'Cause all I ever had:**  
**Redemption songs -**  
**All I ever had:**  
**Redemption songs:**  
**These songs of freedom,**  
**Songs of freedom."**

That song really struck home. She was, again, tearing. "That song was really..."

"Inspirational?" I finished for her.

"Yes. What was it called?"

"Redemption Song." I answered. "I'm glad you liked it. It's my personal favorite, and I'm guessing yours now."

She smiled and nodded. "Indeed." She then yawned and looked outside. It was growing light. "Oh, Tia's already raising the sun! I must go sleep. See you then." She said, getting ready to fly.

"Hey, wait a sec!"

She stopped and turned around. "Yes?"

"Do you have like a spell to make me not tired?" I asked.

"Yes, indeed. Would you like it?"

"Please." And she did. I felt rejuvenated.

"Thanks. Oh, and hey, if I'm asleep when you come, feel free to wake me up."

She smiled and started away. "Will do."

I turned off my iPhone and went out the door.

_Time to fucking eat._

**WAS THAT LONG ENOUGH? Review please!**

**Quote of the Day: "Chucky, your pubes may be clean and shaved, but mines like fucking jungle down there. I shave it maybe once a month." Me to Chucky.**


End file.
